Christmas Spirit

I think everyone should visit a nursing home on Christmas period to see how lucky we are as compared to the residents. Christmas time is a reminder to us to give generously if we can and to rejoice on how fortunate we are to be able to celebrate this festive season with our loved ones.


I want to celebrate Christmas in a very simple and basic way this year. I think working in aged care facilities has taught me to appreciate simpler things more. So this year, we're not spending big or going anywhere, just a quiet family lunch at our place. I want to be able to savour and appreciate every warm moments that I can have with closed and loved ones.

Life, the cruel side.

I've always question life in a very subtle way but recent events that unfold serve a reality check for me. Someone I worked with was involved in an accident during her holiday and has left her paralysed neck down for the rest of her life. Another, has found out that she has cervical cancer. Both girls are only 29. Both have the same occupation as me.

Our occupation require us to deal with unfortunate and disabled clients almost everyday yet there never has been one second that I thought that could have happened to me or someone close to me - that we are always on our side of the game and position - we're the professionals and they're the clients. Subconciously, I thought we're invincible. I tried to think that because she is an Occupational Therapist surrounded by many others that she know, she's going to get the best care out of it; but...on the flip side, because she's an Occupational Therapist, she knows what ahead of her more than an ordinary client, she could already see the hurdles that is waiting ahead for her.

I spent my week at work drowning myself in horrible thoughts, mainly thinking of her and the types of changes that she needs to go through - emotionally, physically, environmentally and most of the time I had to stop myself from thinking because it's just far too cruel. I've received numerous phone calls from colleagues who's working with me who used to work with her, and had to go through the whole process of explaining. And then I had to make numerous phone calls to OTs that I know who may be able to spare a few hours to cover her shift for her for the next months until she's rehabilitated and ready to come back to work - which, to be honest, I'm not even sure if she can. I'm not so close to her to cry for her yet close enough to be bothered by the fact that this succesful 29 year old, soon to be engaged, who has a 700 thousand home loan is at rock bottom now with no income insurance and distorted life direction. And maybe the fact that my life is so similar to her's prior to her accident, that's left me feeling so much for her.

Events like this is never part of the plan we have for our lives; we plan to finish studying and work and get a house, then get married and have children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Yet the likelihood of bad things happening is as comparable to the likelihood of the good. I'm not sure how she's going to be able to cope but I am certain that if I'm in her position, the last thing that I want is to live and face life.

Key to the door

I got the keys to my first home today! Yay!



We packed our last weekends with furniture and home decors shopping. I've got a good idea of what I want to put in the house. The boyfriend is busy planning to build a patio and a water feature for the courtyard. I think he's more excited than me, infact, everyone is more excited than me - my finance broker, my friends, my colleagues, my settlement lawyer. I did not feel the excitement until today, partly because today I've become a legal dog owner. Lol. Let's just say that finally no one can say to me, "You know you're not supposed to have a dog in your property?". And, I know I can paint the house in whatever colour that I like. But most importantly, because I can finally turned my house into my home. =]

Spring has finally sprung!

I have developed a love-hate relationship with spring. I love it because my system yearns for the bright sunshine, the warm but not hot weather, the greenest grass and the colourful flowers; I hate it because it's when the creepy crawlies wake from their hibernation and now they're all over my backyard.

I was talking to my partner the other night when I realized I am turning 25 next year. I've experienced my first neck and shoulder ache that resulted me seeing a physio and buying heatpack to relieve the muscle tightness. I whinged about the pain everyday and suddenly I sound like my mom, ...already! I am becoming more aware of my health and the wrinkles on my hands and face.

This year I find myself a lot calmer and in control of my emotions. I am able to deal with problems in a more mature way, and am more respectful towards people who I love. I have realized that there is so much to life and want to make use of every minutes of my days. I also find pleasure in the little things in life - a visit to the library with my partner means just as much to me as a romantic dinner; gardening can be enjoyable when I do it with someone I love. I am also learning to give more and take less, as a daughter, a partner, a friend and a member of the society.

I know it's not end of the year quite yet, but I'm quite keen for this year to wrap up as I can't wait to finish it with a bang and start afresh with renewed faith and aims for next year.

Road rage

I was driving behind a car that nearly caused three accidents, it baffled me - I thought driving back home is worse than here but I am proved wrong almost every time I drive on Tonkin Highway. To make the matter worse, drivers here are stupid, too. Drivers changing lane without checking blind spot, drivers changing lanes the second they signaled, drivers doing U-turn when they’re not supposed to, drivers changing lanes and squeezing into that tight spot in front of you forcing you to jam break, truck drivers driving on over-taking lane, drivers driving on 70km/h on a 100km/h zone ON THE FAST LANE.

Omg.

So I’ve cursed and sworn, I’ve given the finger, I’ve horned and horned and horned.. Now that’s road rage, isn't it?

Men and cleaning just don't go hand in hand

I kindly asked my partner to help me clean the bathroom this weekend because I had endless chores, errands and I had to go into work on Sunday. Reluctantly, he agreed.

Sunday morning, I woke up and found him in my bathroom, cleaning. For a moment, I was glad that he's willing to help, not the kind of men who just watches TV, plays games and be served like a prince. Before I could finish with that thought completely, suddenly something caught my eyes. I spotted a pail, inside it's filled with water and...WTF....my makeups?!?!! My eyeshadows, my foundations, my eye liners, concealers and mascara!! My precious makeups!! I don't think I breathed for a few seconds.

So this is what happened - my very thoughtful partner thought that the covers of my makeup cases are all dusty and so he decided to clean them - Great! My problem is that he's dumped all of them into WATER to clean the case!!! If you're wondering what happened to my makeup - well, let's just put it this way - some needs to be replaced. Are you thinking what I'm thinking too - why can't he just bloody wipe the cases down with a wet cloth?! Well, he's got an answer for you - That's too much trouble.

Argghhhhhh..MEN!! Don't ask me what happened after that.

Regrets: I have a few.

Regrets, we’ve all tasted the bitterness of it.

Recently I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, serious thinking – about my life and what I’ve achieved. It’s just so weird because on the surface, my life this year is perhaps the text book definition of stability. I’ve finished Master and got a job as a Registered Occupational Therapist almost instantly. I’m well-paid, I’m confident and good at my job. I’m independent, I live by myself and I have a dog. My parents are proud of me; people around me think I’ve built a path to success. But I don’t.

Maybe the stability has gotten the worse of me. I feel like I have no room to grow and improve anymore. I’ve lived 23 years of my life studying, constantly improving academically and non-academically. And suddenly, it’s plateau. And so my life has finally slowed down, which means that I’ve finally had a chance to stop and think, and look back just to check if I’ve always made the right decision. To be honest, I’m not sure if I did. Yea, I’ve gotten myself to where I am this stage of my life, a stable income and stable 9-5pm job but...this, is not my dream. I look around me, I see friends who put their feet down and pursue their dreams and I regret I did not follow their footsteps.

I gave up the dream of becoming a musician in an orchestra, taking on my dream job around the world. And then...I also gave up my other dream, of becoming a psychologist. Just because what I’m doing now seemed more logical, and reality-based. I chose to take on the safest path, now I’m finally faced with the consequence of it, and I never thought it’ll be this significant to my life.